A Letter to “All Things Considered” concerning Pirates

Below is the letter I submitted to NPR’s “All Things Considered” after hearing the word “pirate” so many times it was not only ridiculous….but laughable that there isn’t a more suitable word to describe these…..well anyway read on.

Consider This: Redefining the Pirate to Protect our Youth

To Whom It May Concern,

As an avid listener of NPR and its programming, it has come to my attention that the word “pirate” ought be placed under scrutiny (or face mutiny if you will) by a more appropriate verbiage.
Pirate is no longer the one-eyed swashbuckler of boyhood fantasy. It has become, as it pertains to the newsroom, a term for a type of terrorist. The youthful wonderment spawned in the likes of Peter Pan and Captain Jack Sparrow has been dashed by the everyday use of the term “pirate” as it relates to current events.

So… without going overboard here…
I propose adding the following two words to your Report-oire.

First if we change terrorist to terrarist it can mean Terrorist of the Land. Derived from terra meaning earth.

Then we ought to coin the term marerist to describe Terrorist of the Sea. Derived from mare meaning sea.

In doing so we can save pirates for Halloween costumes and the peg-legged scalliwag fantasies of our youth thereby protecting innocence and imagination while preserving NPRs unwavering respect and commitment to the art of reporting.

Sincerely: Cate Nelson Founder of P.I.R.A.T.E.
Pretty Idiotic Rebels Advocating Thoughtful Etymology

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~ by Cate Nelson on May 7, 2009.